Tag America

If you’ve never been to the Upper Peninsula —GOOD! Don’t go. It isn’t for you. It’s a shit place with nothing to do and nothing to see. Stay away, for your own good.

If you have been, then you know it’s heaven on Earth, and not to tell anyone about it. The first rule of the real diehards of the UP, the so called Yoopers, is not talk about the UP with the trolls. Trolls, if you don’t know, are everyone who live under the Mackinac Bridge, which separates the Upper Peninsula from the rest of Michigan. And the rest of the planet, really. If you do make it past the bridge, stop at the Yooper Tourist Trap. It’s well worth a visit.

Michigan’s Upper Peninsula is one of the most stunning natural places on this little blue ball. The fresh water lakes, the untouched forests, the rivers and waterfalls tucked away from the swarms of tourists. It’s a dreamland for the outdoor enthusiast.

Biblical Plagues in Rapid Secession

There are downsides to the UP, and they aren’t for the weak of heart or faint of knee. ‘Round about spring the mosquitos hatch. These nasty buggers can hatch right out of the snow. I’ve seen them crawling around on the ice looking for blood. There aren’t a few mosquitos here or there, but swarms of them so thick you can’t go outdoors.

One time my dad and I decided to hike to a nearby lake through the woods. I had head to two coverage and a hat. I had on so much mosquito repellant that I probably gave myself brain damage. My boots covered my feet, and I had gloves on my hands. So, we set out in mosquito season. ‘Round about the time we reached the other lake I couldn’t take it. I snapped an evergreen bough off of a nearby tree and started whacking the air around me. I saw the lake, muttered, “yeah, it’s great. Let’s get out of here.” And we dashed home, swinging pine boughs at the mosquitos. My neck, face, ears, wrists and ankles were covered in bites.

When the mosquitos die down a bit, the mayflies hatch. These congest the surface of everything from screen doors to picnic tables to windshields to boats. And if you were planning on fishing during bass season you can forget about it, because the fish are full to the gills with mayflies. They don’t want your stupid lure, they want a La-Z-Boy and a multi series Netflix show to binge while they chill in their nests and ignore you.

After the mayflies come the bitting flies. These assholes will nip and gouge at any exposed skin on your body, including your eyelids. But, if you think you’ll just wear long sleeves and pants to fool them you can forget about it, because they can bite through steel. Also, it’s 90 degrees outside, Celsius, and you’re damp and covered in sweat, which only attracts more flies.

And then there is about a week of nothing trying to bite or kill you. In that week, you can enjoy the fall foliage, stroll around in the amber-tinted forests or take in stunning vistas of Lake Superior.

After the Plagues Come the Snow

But right as you start thinking, “Hey, we should get a cabin up here,” the snow hits. And it hits hard. In the UP there is snow from about early October to round about May. And if you haven’t heard the very technical term “round-about” before, you haven’t studied the weather or insect patterns of the UP because that’s as good as it gets. ‘Round about is a technical term in the UP.

Finally, the fishing report for the UP: Many of the folks who come up, the trolls, they come up for the fishing and hunting. Hunting season is so-so, but you might as well stay downstate and save yourself the $5 Mackinac Bridge fare. Lodging costs more in the UP for hunters, too. Stay away, stop killing all of our wildlife, ya jerks. Fishing, on the other hand, is also horrible in the UP. So many people escaped to Michigan after the tourism board launched their Pure Michigan campaign that pretty much all of the fish in the great lakes are now in troll bellies down south. Fishing reports for the past five years have been abyssal. 

‘Round about now, you’re probably asking why I’m even writing about the UP. The answer is that this is a warning, a morality tale of sorts. Stay out of the UP so the fish come back, and the mosquito populations die down. Stay away, ya damn trolls! Back, back! Try somewhere else in America.

Minnesota, Wisconsin and Michigan are the land of plenty. Plenty of space. Plenty of weight on the locals. Plenty of cheese on the french fries. Plenty of everything. We started in Minneapolis, home of the Mall of America, the largest mall in the country. You can walk for hours and not see everything. I know. We tried. There is a theme park in the center, a movie theatre, spas, hundreds of shops and dozens of restaurants. Anything you want you can find at Mall of America, except your car. You’re going to lose your car. My god, where is the car?

Minnesota: Lakes, Malls and Snow

Minneapolis has a great free zoo in Como Park, out on the east side. Check out the Como Park Conservatory. You can donate at the entrance if you want to, or don’t. I don’t care. But we always tried to drop a few bucks in the pot because damn do they do a good job with the animals at Como. They have a free-range sloth in the greenhouse area, and there are meerkats all over the place right inside the entrance. They have larger animals, too, but for me the greenhouse always won out. Such a lovely spot to come, especially in the colder months. Which, in Minnesota, are about 10 months of the year.

If you’re anybody at all worth knowing than you live on Lake Minnetonka. We don’t, because we’re not worth knowing, but we have friends on the lake. Experiencing how the elite live is a joy and a curse. It’s such a delight to experience, but then you have to zip up your suitcase and go back to the cheap motels with holes in the bedding and curly hairs in the sheets. You can get a taste of the rich life by strolling around the quaint villages that ring the lake, or driving down the mansion-lined streets. There are several open access points to the lake. You can even check out Prince’s house, which is nearby.

Wisconsin: Land of Cheese and Roller Coasters

Wisconsin is famous for cheese, but also for the Wisconsin Dells, which house a bunch of theme parks. Here you can ride all manner of rollercoaster or spinning tea cup. There are decent resorts and it’s near enough to an airport that you don’t have a long drive after landing. The prices are reasonable in the off season, and a bit extreme in summer. If you ever wanted to learn an Eastern European language, many of the staff at the Wisconsin Dells resorts and theme parks are there on summer work visas. 

We didn’t spend much time in Wisconsin because it wasn’t theme park season. Instead, we sort of transited the state, and our hearts thank us for avoiding the artery-blocking cuisine.

Michigan: The Mosquito’s Playground

Michigan is for nature lovers. If you don’t love nature, don’t bother congesting the freeways and airports, it won’t be the place for you. The best thing to do in Michigan is get outside. Detroit has a lot to offer, as does Ann Arbor, but your best bet is to get into the woods, enjoy the lakes, go on an ATV ride or rent snowmobiles if it’s winter. Just get yourself geared up and get outside.

With the launch of the Pure Michigan tourism campaign, RV, ATV, boat and snowmobile enthusiasts from around America started to explore the bounty of Michigan. This was great for the economy but bad for those of us who were already outside enjoying the peace and quiet. Nothing says hike faster than having a group of loud tourists behind you in the peaceful forrest.

I have so much more to say about Michigan. I’ll do a whole post on the Upper Peninsula soon, so stay tuned.

We have done a lot of US road tripping, check out more on the Road Trip page.

Back in the states I’m always amazed at how often I find myself at the store. I feel there is always something I “need” which, of course, isn’t true. The American life is set up to create the perfect consumer. Sometimes, I think we’re the robots they created just to keep the machine of our economy alive.

We get out of high school and go to college. Bam! Now we’re in debt and have to have a job to pay off the debt we accrued. There isn’t another way. It’s ironic because people blame the Universities for being liberally skewed but there for-profit institutions are what trap many Americans into the most conservative lifestyle.

If you didn’t go to college, you’re kicked out of the home around 18 and encouraged to have the all-American work ethic. Time to get a job, bum! Use that required education you were forced to receive to flip burgers or stock shelves. What about travel? What about just wandering around thinking? When will you have the time to define who you are?

Here’s how: you watch TV, see fashionable, fit people with great jobs, great hair and Nikes. Now you need a pair of Nikes to prove you’re on track. To prove you have a job, are worth something to society. Society invested in you and now makes you feel guilty if you diverge from your predestined path. You have to SHOW you belong in this society or you’ll be scoffed. Don’t want to shave your legs young woman?- hippie! Don’t want to comb your hair young man?- pothead! Don’t want to get a job?- bum! The list goes on. And it’s all based around consuming things.

Capitalism is an economic idea and doesn’t have to be tied to the idea of democracy. You can bash one and have the other. In fact, we could agree as a democracy to do so, but so many Americans have the idea that capitalism is our way of life, not the democratic part. When we say we are spreading democracy, is that all we want to spread or are we opening new markets for our products? When a building making clothes for us collapses and kills 500 people do we feel guilty for demanding such cheap prices for things that we force laborers we don’t want to look at to be stacked several stories high. Good thing they are out of sight, too, because they don’t wear the right stuff or behave the right way to fit into our paradigm. That’s oversimplified, of course, but it is worth thinking about how much our ideology of consumerism is impacting not just us, but everyone around us.

Homes in many other countries are not decorated. They don’t have shelves or storage because they don’t (or can’t) stockpile. We have cabinets full of stuff we don’t use on a daily basis. Begging the question of why we bought it in the first place. Other homes just have a table (where you eat) and some floor space (where you sleep). You don’t need much to be happy and content. A roof, some source of heat, family, food. My neighbors spend a fortune on chemicals to make their grass greener. That’s money they worked hard for, time they spent away from their families. They buy yard art to impress their neighbors, “See! I’m productive and relevant to society!”

We even rate our economy by consumer confidence. How confident are we as a people? Let’s express it by purchasing things we don’t need. That shows we’re on track to a bright future. Ha!

We’re not immune at all. We live in a suburb at the moment that is quite stunning. We have nice furniture, art on the walls, cabinets full of things and drawers full of more things. Things are all around us. We’re very American in this sense. But, with all these American capitalist-consumer things, we’re detached from the people around us because we’re so surrounded in things and work. I’d like to see more of the democracy part of our ideology and less of the commercials, radio ads, billboards, newspaper ads, coupons and other reminders of consumerism. What if there were that many reminders of our national ideology? Wouldn’t that be neat (or perhaps, too much?).

Today I read in the news that “Spring Breakers” earned $270,000 in just three theaters, (that’s $90k a theater, folks). Having seen the preview I was shocked that it wasn’t direct-to-DVD, or even a direct-to-Wal-Mart-$5-Bin. This says a lot about us as a country.

As “Spring Breakers” rakes in the cash, I’m reading stories about how print media is out of popularity and local news stations are struggling to keep the lights on. Does this all mean that we, as a nation, are getting dumber?

Here’s the case for a nation in retardation:

1.) Americans don’t have (or don’t want) access to good information. Even the best newspapers and TV have to report celebrity gossip to stay relevant. I don’t want to hear about Lil’ Wayne’s Sizzurp addiction. I don’t care and don’t know how this miniature Wayne is.
2.) NPR, which used to report the news in a decent fashion, spends more time tooting it’s own Classical horn between segments and reading short stories than it does interviewing interesting, relevant people or reporting interesting, global news. A wasted resource and a constant annoyance if it’s not the top of the hour.
3.) No matter how hard I try, I can’t find a radio or TV station that reports comprehensive international news. The best news source I’ve found is Wikipedia’s daily news recap. There are 6 billion people on the planet—a lot is going on out there that is way more interesting than sizzurp. If only we could find out about it without having to rip our hair out in the process.
4.) Issues that should be social and not political now dominate the political conversation. I’d love to hear a politician talk about their 9-5 without talking about a single social issue. I challenge any politician to try this wild, crazy idea.
5.) Our two-party system, (which is actually a split one-party system) is more divided than ever on benign issues and we have a government that makes a mockery of the people by assuming the divide even matters. This isn’t daytime TV, it’s politics. I don’t want to hear John Boehner tell anyone to **** off, or have anyone pontificate to me about gay marriage. We have a constitution for a reason. When in doubt, refer to it. Simple!
6.) I have yet to meet an American who supports a bi-lingual system for us. Languages expand the way you think. New ways or wording things mean new ways of seeing the world, and yet ignorance and sheer stubbornness prohibits this country from growing and learning another national language. If we all learn Spanish do you really think we’ll suddenly open the borders? No, but we will be better neighbors, have an expanded worldview and be able to travel without miming our intentions. Get over your prejudices and let your kids learn Spanish (or Mandarin, or French or whatever—anything!).

I’m in love with our nation’s fundamental ideas. Our forefathers did one of the coolest things in human history when they set up a democratic republic founded by normal farmers, bartenders, lawyers and the like. They tried to create a system that would be free of tyranny and answer to the masses. It’s about the coolest thing imaginable and is the exact opposite of what usually happens when a bunch of people arrive in a new place without law.

I’m so proud to be a part of the continuation of that brave idea. We’re the nation Winthrop called “ a beacon on a hill.” I just wish we’d act more like it and pay homage to our past without disgracing it. I wish we’d be at the forefront of political thought, not sucking hind tit. I wish we’d have the foremost thinkers, philosophers, mathematicians and inventors. That we’d have the best writers, the best philanthropists, and the best painters. In many of these cases we hold the honor, but as a whole I feel we’re falling backwards into archaic, simple-minded thinking. A nation like ours shouldn’t slowly fade into the image of the governments we stuck out across the waters to evade. Hopefully we brighten up and find our way. I’m still rooting for the home team.

By Al Green we do in fact mean the amazing, talented and smooth creator of “Let’s Stay Together” and “Love and Happiness.” He is one of gospel and soul’s biggest names and he recently went on tour. Sadly, we missed it. But we did hear that he was the reverend at the Tabernacle Church in Memphis, so we got up at the crack of dawn on Sunday and headed for Memphis, leaving lovely Nashville in our rearview mirror.

We drove by Elvis Presley’s Graceland, and were surprised at how rundown the area was, and how kitschy the place looked. I know it’s Graceland and it’s meant to be kitschy but wow! Not far from where tours leave for Graceland you’ll find the Reverend Al Green’s church.

We pulled into the parking lot and saw several people heading inside. We followed them in and opened the doors to the sanctuary to reveal that we were one of about eight white folks in the room. They were already well into the service (which started at 11am) when we arrived at 30 minutes after the hour. We took seats near the back in case our infant started to howl.

The music was amazing! Al Green wasn’t there yet, but his choir and choir leaders were stellar. They sang almost on improve and the live band was equally astonishing. You could tell they loved what they were doing. They sang their prayers.

At noon Al Green came out in white gloves and a black reverend smock. He swayed with the music and received applause and turned all the applause upward. He was very humble and deflecting of attention. His mother led the announcements, and his nephew gave the sermon. Al Green was the greeter, occasional singer and commentator. As we gave tithe he asked us where we were from. Mike said “Chicago” and he started singing “hello Chicago!” as we walked by. Nice guy, and a very friendly congregation. He even made a “Love and Happiness” reference. Nice.

We left Memphis after church. Driving around downtown proved that the city itself has a lot to be desired, especially after the beauty of downtown Nashville.

One of the best times to see DC is on a Sunday. Especially on a Sunday when there isn’t a big activity downtown. Here’s how we saw DC.

We drove right past the pentagon and around the bend into down town. We rolled into town without encountering any traffic around 10am. Downtown, there was virtually no traffic and all the lights seemed to turn green as we approached. We drove by the capital building, headed around the White House and drove past a few of the beautiful museums.

Granted, we had very limited time in the city and many miles to cover by nightfall, so we didn’t end up walking around. Instead, we drove all through down, winding up and down streets and passing by the city’s top attractions. We decided that DC is a city that deserves more time. However, if you have the time, free parking on weekends was available and spaces were readily available. I think so many people in the area are terrified of the traffic that they never even attempt to drive into town. If you’re of this mindset the park-and-ride is a great option but takes about half an hour from outside of town.

We also learned that you now have to apply to see the White House several months in advance and get early screening approval before you can show up. If you want to plan a trip to DC perhaps apply first and buy your airline tickets once your approval comes through.

Okay, so we’re not sure what the top sights in New Hampshire really are, but we’d be happy to tell you what we saw!

Mount Washington Hotel and Resort is a beautiful retreat away from the bustle of the East Coast. It’s a self-contained mini paradise. We’re talking spa, pool, tea room, bar and dining room, wine room and of course amazing views of the mountains as well as the gold course. I assume there are great hiking trails nearby and the concierge would be happy to point the right direction. One of the greatest amenities, though, was the massive fireplace in the center of the lobby and the board-game room behind it. This is the largest indoor fireplace I’ve seen, and I imagine a bottle of wine and a good book would be great accessories for it.
We also got to see the former home of the late celebrity actress Betty Davis. Yes, she did summer in New Hampshire, as did many of the rich and famous once upon a time. Betty Davis lived in a small cottage in the woods off the beaten path outside Frankonia. Her home was made of wood, and has a secret passage way between the two bedrooms (tsk, tsk Miss Davis!). A beautiful arches wooden ceiling was the main highlight, and the new addition to the home stayed true to the time period, adding appeal and even more old-world charm. Of course the walls are covered in Betty Davis memorabilia.

Downtown Littleton is another great reason to visit New Hampshire. We were impressed by the world’s longest candy bar at Chutters. The oldest surviving building is indeed quite old, and beautiful as well. The whole downtown area is just as quaint as a postcard. My favorite shop was the Little Herb Shop where the owner was incredibly friendly and kind, and she carried a great selection of herbs.

But of course the most famous thing to see in New Hampshire are the leaves in fall, and we hit that perfectly. Driving up to the overpasses to see rolling red, orange and yellow hills was a joy no East Coaster should miss.

There are over 300 million Americans. Less than 30% of them have passports. That means Americans are not traveling abroad. And 50% of those who do leave the USA are traveling to either Canada or Mexico. So, why is it that Americans are not traveling overseas in larger numbers?

Realistically, money and time are the two biggest factors in our estimation as to why Americans don’t travel abroad. Airfare is costly and flying is a hassle. Meanwhile, Americans on average get around two weeks of vacation a year– not enough to get abroad, get over jet-lag and start enjoying another country. In reality, many of those vacation days are used here and there for extensions on Thanksgiving, for family birthdays or other small events, and that results in, usually, less than two weeks in one chunk for travel. Its not surprising that Asia or the Middle East seems out of reach to Americans who have around 7 days to travel, explore and return. That doesn’t sound like a vacation, it sounds like a gauntlet.

In contrast, the average worker in Europe gets around a month of vacation. By law, all countries in the European Union must allow all workers four weeks of paid vacation at a minimum. Even part-time workers who have worked more than 13 weeks are entitled to their month of paid vacation. This isn’t accrued, its a right. And that doesn’t count public holidays, which are paid days. Americans get 13 days, on average, though some companies have adopted even stricter vacation plans for entry-level employees, like the company Mike worked for in Minnesota. They told him his two weeks of vacation were “To ambitious for an entry level employee.” To which Mike said “audios!” (Chart above shows average PAID vacation days by country)

Meanwhile, workers in the USA have longer daily hours, on average, then their European counterparts. This is interesting because the average salary (even taking into account cost of living) is lower in the USA on average. For example, countries in Europe have a standard 40 hour work week and depending on the country there are laws in place to put a cap on how many hours of overtime per week and year an employee can log, according to the Federation of European Employees. And although the 8 hour day wasn’t always in place, it wasn’t until 1937 that the Fair Labor Standards Act was signed into law and the 8 hour work day (44 per week) in America became accepted as a baseline for a new standard. (Chart above shows average work week by country and gender).

Granted, there are social implications to these differences in Europe and the US. For example, Europeans are taxed at a much higher rate and companies have to sell products at higher prices to follow labor laws. However, the work-life balance in Europe does seem to be more balanced than in the USA, where success is more important that enjoyment to many. Still, the differences are drastic, and many health related problems in America are stress related, possibly stemming from overwork and lack of holiday time.

Along an entirely different chain of thought, perhaps one reason for the shortage of Americans traveling is fear. American movies constantly have foreigners as the ‘bad guys’ and a general lack of knowledge about other countries and their cultures in the US may lead many to think it isn’t safe anywhere abroad. When the media constantly cover problems abroad in uniquely terrifying language, its no wonder people think the entire world is dangerous. Meanwhile, Americans don’t speak a second language, and this limits their capacity to travel abroad with confidence. Luckily, English is the language of travel, but to many places (Africa and Asia) even English won’t suffice. The American education system should require students to learn a second language fluently by the time they graduate from High School. What language they learn should be their choice, naturally, but it holds people back from traveling, working abroad or even understanding a second worldview when they are limited to one language. Ideas are only as solid as the language in which they are expressed, so learning a whole new language is like learning a second culture, a second way of viewing the world. Americans (myself included) miss out on this when they don’t learn a second language as a child.

CNN Travel recently did a story on the surprisingly low number of Americans who travel abroad. We were excited to see they quoted several of our fellow international travel bloggers, folks like Nomadic Matt and Everything Everywhere.

US citizens can learn how to apply for a US passport.

Folks are talking about the environment in a new way. Global warming, greenhouses gasses, Co2 emissions, and our dependency on a depleting oil supply, dependency on mass produced and imported foods. While there aren’t many people out there who think how we treat the world we live in is acceptable, there are very few willing to do anything meaningful about it. Buying carbon credits to offset your usage may be the world’s dumbest idea. So, if you’ve decided to abandon your cubicle and you are looking for a meaningful way to escape from society for a while, why not consider a year in a commune? America has many independent, organic and otherwise less harmful communities where you can exchange your labor for food and lodging. Simply put, you get to escape the cubicle but also society as you know it, and decrease your damage to the planet in a drastic way.

For starters, check out Natural Communities Magazine, where you’ll find articles on natural living, health and general well being as well as environmental protection and appreciation. “As more and more people are seeking natural health, Natural Communities will be an indispensable personal resource for people on the path to a healthy, natural lifestyle, bringing positive solutions to life’s challenges.” Based in the Mid-west, this magazine is a good place to start thinking about joining a commune or at least living a healthier lifestyle.

GrowFood is an organization that connects farmers with people who want to learn about organic and sustainable farming. Their mission is to “help grow a community of 50 million new small-scale organic farmers. That’s how many it will take to break America’s dependency on factory food.” Dependency on mass produced and imported foods has caused sicknesses to increase because people are not utilizing the foods and medicines grown naturally in their area. Meanwhile, mass produced stuff is never of high quality. GrowFood can teach you all about the problems in this area and even offers the hands on chance to learn a better way.

The WWOOF, which is the World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms is a group dedicated to offering people around the world the opportunity to learn.  “In return for volunteer help, WWOOF hosts offer food, accommodation and opportunities to learn about organic lifestyles.” This is great because the average person probably can’t identify some of the plants, herbs and vegetables they eat on a daily basis in their natural habitat. If an emergency ever occurred, would you be able to find food, grow food, or raise your own meat? Less dramatically, a self sufficient farm is a great way to ensure you always have food available, and reconnect with nature.

The Fellowship of Intentional Community, although somewhat of a cult-like name, is simply “an inclusive term for ecovillages, co-housing communities, residential land trusts, communes student co-ops, urban housing cooperatives,  intentional living, alternative communities, cooperative living, and other projects where people strive together with a common vision.” You’ll find information on whats available out there in terms of places to escape from society and reconnect with community and nature. An organized directory offers the exact information you need to get started.

Should you abandon the cube, abandon society and move to a commune? I can’t answer that for you, but I do think spending some time learning about natural living, or a healthier way to look at the world is useful. Even a day trip to a commune to see another concept of community and environmentalism would be an eye-opener. While Al Gore cries about global warming, he lives in a mansion and drives a car, uses air-con, flushes toilet paper and so on. Why not try a method of actually returning to nature rather than buying your way out of a guilty conscience?

Lofted Organic Home, by Doornob Designs (image)

We left the Brooklyn docks in the intense heat index of 110 degrees F on July 6th.  Hauling our backpacks, chalked full of (almost) everything we needed for the Mongol Rally – ranging from clothing and safety equipment to Russian phrase books and a toilet seat.  Needless to say, we were a rare sight on the Cunard’s Queen Mary II.  The very first day on board, we headed directly to the ship’s library and I perused the nautical history section in detail.  I read through early pirate history along America’s coastline, read about the crossing of the Titanic – White Star is now Cunard, and I also came across a great book about the Mayflower and a history of the pilgrims before they left the England and Holland.

Attending lectures by John Maxtone – Graham, author of The Only Way to Cross and Liners to the Sun, by day and

concerts and balls by night, Lauren had our entire days outlined by 8:00 the previous evening.  Graham gave extremely interesting portrayals of the History of Cunard, the building and crossing of the Titanic, and life on-board crossings during the 19th and early 20th century.  These lectures and histories really opened our eyes to the amazing way we started off our journey, which would / will eventually take us to Europe, Mongolia, and eventually Southeast Asia.

I eagerly watched the satellite image of the Queen Mary II cross over the final resting place of the Titanic 2.5 miles below our feet.  I walked up on the deck of the ship and looked out at the water realizing how much difference 3 months makes when cruising the North Atlantic.  I looked out over a foggy fairly calm sea in a humid 74 degrees Fahrenheit.  We had fog, but practically no fear of icebergs in July.  In April of 1912, we would have seen our breath in the cool air and the icy waters below.

After crossing over the sunken wreck of the Titanic, I read daily about the preparations the pilgrims made to come to America.  I read with great interest as I learned things which I had never been taught in school about the pilgrims crossing.  There had originally been two ships one was called the Speedway, which was purchased by the exiled pilgrims in Holland when they grew impatient with the negotiations with “sponsors” in England.  By the time they had arrived, a company called the Merchant Adventurers had purchased a ship called the Mayflower for their voyage.  There was great turmoil between the pilgrims and the Merchant Adventurers, who aimed to profit off the fishing around the new colony.  My previous understanding had been that they simply could go where ever they pleased in the New World, however in fact, they had to get land patents granted by the crown.

There were also accusations that Holland, who had claimed a right to Manhattan Island, attempted to delay the pilgrims and keep them away from the New World because the Pilgrims’ land patent was at the mouth of the Hudson River, which was too close for comfort.  There were many more facts which I will spare you that I found interesting about their voyage.  It was slightly amusing as I pulled my head up from the book, reading about how the Mayflower was in a turbulent storm in the mid-Atlantic and how the crossing took 60 plus days.  I, on the other hand, looked around took a sip of beer and listened to children laughing in the pool in front of me and was also in the Mid-Atlantic after just 4 days.

Once we arrived in Southampton, I discovered it was only a short walk with all of our gear (in much cooler weather than in Brooklyn a few days ago) to the Mayflower monument. We headed that direction and a wave of fascination swept over me as I looked up at the giant stone monument to the Mayflower crew. Strangely, there are bronze signs for many people on board but not for my ancestor, William Bradford. Hopefully after the rally this is something I’ll be able to remedy.

I’m growing a bit concerned about the folks on talk radio in the USA. We’ve had ol’ Limbaugh for quite some time, but recently I’ve noticed a surge in folks on the extreme right and left who take up the airways and fill them with drivel. Remember the good old days of Paul Harvey and ‘The Rest of the Story’? That was high quality radio right there! I’m really craving a show that gives interesting facts (not political points)or even a bit of American history. I know some stations donate a solid minute a day to history in the form of ‘this day in history’ but that simply doesn’t meet my apatite for good radio. I’d love a show where radio hosts interview surviving WWII veterans, or chat with politicians about their childhoods, moral ideologies and thoughts instead of their current events attitudes. It would be nice to see a wider picture of America than the Billboard top 20, the latest in celebrity gossip, and the diatribes of the psychotic.

Just a thought.

I don’t count. I simply do not exist nor do I count to the American government. Ten years ago I was overseas and wasn’t counted. As it happens, Americans living abroad not involved with the government are simply not counted in the census. Thus, for the last two censuses I’ve been nonexistent. A census representative had a booth set up in my home town. I asked the gentlemen about my status and made him exceedingly sad when I made a sad remark about not mattering. I think he took me a bit literally. Anyways, he filled me in on the policy of us non-VIPs living overseas. The bare bones of it—you don’t count.

This wasn’t my first interaction with the 2010 census. Down in Texas (where we did a bit of traveling last winter) we noticed dozens of billboards along the Mexican border with signs like “Be honest on the Census. Immigration officials do not have access to census files.” And things of that nature. We suddenly noticed some of Hollywood’s A-list stars on TV telling us politely to fill out the census forms. And each evening when we turned on the news we saw talking heads talking about the upcoming ordeal. How many millions were spent making these commercials, billboards and forms?—not to mention the folks who went door to door!

My personal experiences with the census didn’t stop with my sad encounter with the census rep in my home town. Nope, a young man came to the family home where I happened to be visiting and demanded to know why there were several people at the house when only one was listed. I told him I didn’t count, and he said that I did! Success! I matter again! He took down my name and hopped in his Toyota and zipped down the driveway as I basked in my newly gained self importance. I matter!

Alas, this simply isn’t the case. Recently up in the Upper Peninsula, in Michigan, a census woman emerged from the woods and inquired about our residency and status. We told her we sometimes matter and sometimes don’t, depending on which census representative is asking. Turns out we decidedly don’t matter in the UP. Defeated again! (although obviously, the April 1st point did not apply to us) On a funny side note, this poor lady said some of these cabins in the woods she is sent to have no roads, only paths, and she has walked several miles down trails only to emerge suddenly in the front yard of a small cabin. “Aren’t you worried about getting shot?” I asked her. “I’d get worker’s comp.” she replied. Funny lady. Apparently she has walked and hiked and driven all over the UP and has quite a few interesting encounters with the yoopers (upper peninsula locals) not to mention the very active wildlife. She confirmed my earliest suspicion that we didn’t matter and then laced up her hiking boots and headed back into the woods. This is one very thorough government!

Despite the seeming confusion about the census, I’m very excited to see the results. I can’t wait to see how some of the places I’ve lived and visited have changed and grown (or shrunk, whatever the case). I think it is a great practice, and I am honestly excited about it. Almost like a sitcom you love that you have to wait to see the finale for—come on 2010 census information! I wonder how long it will take for the results to get into the public domain (aka-Wikipedia) for each city/county/state, etc.

We’ve spent a few weeks in Michigan’s UP, the Upper Peninsula surrounded by great lakes. It is a beautiful, if not rugged landscape that grows tough, hardy people who are simultaneously hard as nails and yet as friendly as Home Improvement’s Wilson character. You can walk into a diner or bar in the UP and see some of the world’s most flannel-clad, bearded and grime covered men, only to have them pull out a chair for you or hold open the door with a tip of their baseball cap. It reminds me of a time I’ve never experienced, but only heard about. People leave their doors unlocked, and neighbors stop by almost daily to chat about the weather, the fishing conditions or whether or not you saw the deer out by the lake the previous evening.

Here is a story to demonstrate my point: The septic tank pump broke and alarms were going off in the cabin. We dug out the still water hole and replaced the pump. Meanwhile, neighbors from the left and right side of the cabin sauntered over to offer their help, advice and the use of their facilities until we solved the problem. Neighbors from even further down the road heard of the incident and drove by to see if they could help. It was like a sitcom scene where the whole town shows up in the yard to help one family. I had heard of such things in the past from my grandparents (or history books) but up in the UP that is just daily life. The community has taken us under their wing, given us local history lessons, books, food and fishing and hiking tips. It’s like we’re part of the family—two long lost prodigal grandchildren who suddenly returned from out of the woods. It’s a great feeling, and one we’ve never experienced anywhere we’ve traveled. All hail to simplicity!

On an unrelated note, our time in the UP has yielded quite a few fish as we try our hands at acquiring our food from the wild. As it stands, I have caught several large bass while Mike seems to be a pro at walleye and pike. I learned to filet the fish, a task which involved (sadly) cutting it open and taking out the parts Americans don’t eat. It made me sad since we’ve seen folks in China dig into the organs and eyes, head, etc and yet we’re wasting those parts here in the US. I have no idea how to cook fish head, but when I’m back in China I’ll take a cooking lesson or two so I don’t have to toss out half the fish in the future. I have this theory that you shouldn’t eat meat if you couldn’t or wouldn’t go out and catch/kill it yourself and prepare it from the moment you capture it to the moment you eat it. I’m testing this long-held philosophy with the fish. So far, it involves petting the bass and apologizing to it, turning around while Mike stuns it, and then I’ll cut it open (while apologizing) and then filet and skin the meat parts. Then I apologize a bit more while I’m washing and storing the fish. I never considered myself a city girl, but I think these Yoopers (UP locals) would have a good laugh if they saw me petting and apologizing to my recently caught bass.

We just returned this evening from a small neighborhood gathering where some of the town’s most well known locals had us (and a few other cabins) over for desert. We chatted about many things, but no political or religious conversations emerged. We talked at great length, however, about the beaver population (did you know a beaver can live up to 80 years!) and told stories around the table of our travels abroad (everyone was extremely intelligent and well traveled). I have to say, it was a really amazing, simple and perfect evening with the Yoopers.

You can’t consider yourself a long-term thinker if you shop at Wal-Mart, Best Buy, or any other major chain in the United States. Here is why: they outsource. Simply put, we get products for cheaper but in the end more folks here will be unemployed which will result in fewer purchases long term. Folks at these major corporations have to realize they are simply sucking as many greenbacks as possible out of the economy while it lasts. An entire economy based on service industries is hardly a stable one, but that is where we seem to be heading.

So, why do I take it out on Wal-Mart? Honestly, it isn’t really fair. Wal-Mart is just a prime example because they sell the largest range of crappy products on the market, stretching from crappy sewing machines to crappy electronics to crappy plastic toys to crappy, low-quality clothing. This isn’t much different from most other major corporations, but this one is more prevalent. Its like blaming McDonald’s for all fast-food woes.

Yesterday I was looking at a piece of antique furniture. Unless doused in gasoline or saturated in water, this thing will be around long after I am. Something about that is much more comforting than looking at the $20 Ikea equivalent. Our culture demands things for cheaper and cheaper, and when a deal is good we’ll buy the product even if we’re fully aware it is sup par. We seem more than happy to accept that an item has a shelf-life. I’d much prefer to buy something once and have it for life. My life, not the life span attributed to it because it will whither away on its own accord over time.

I remember the day I returned to the USA having spent several years in Germany as a child. We got away from the airport in our rental car and I asked my dad why all the houses were made out of cardboard. An astute observation for a child, I have to say. It turns out it isn’t cardboard, but 2×4 pine boards with a bit of drywall and nails. The shelf life of a home in the USA is under 50 years, and this seems downright sad. Mike and I recently worked with Habitat for Humanity down in Texas and were shocked at the minimal amount that actually goes into making a house. Once you see the process from A to Z you start to wonder how the thing lasts even 50 years. Meanwhile, in Germany homes are built to last several generations. They can spend the additional money to make it correctly and make it sturdy because no one family is supporting the entire weight of the bill. If America were to start to make better homes, it would have to change the underlying cultural trends wherein children leave the nest and move to an entirely new area.

This reminds me of a story my grandfather told me when I was younger. He said the US government brought in some German road engineers to teach them how to build long-lasting roads. The Germans dig way into the earth and layer with straw, sand, tar, cement, straw and much more over and over again for around 2 meters. When they finally slap on the last coat they have a product that can withstand extreme weight, weather and use. The Americans were impressed and started to mimic the German road-building method. Suddenly, construction was halted as a politician pointed out that all the road workers would eventually work themselves out of a job with these long-lasting roads. I don’t doubt the story is true, but I do doubt that we would work ourselves out of road jobs by making them right the first time.

I recently read that there are two types of belief systems- utilitarianism and deontology. The former type believes in the greatest good for the greatest number of people while the latter believes in personal rights, regardless of the outcome. Americans seem to be distinctly deontologists, and are concerned about the jobs of the workers over the long-term happiness and convenience of millions of Americans who would enjoy driving to work without dodging orange cones. I think this is interesting because I’d much prefer the roads to be done right, to the highest possible quality at a higher price tag now, and then save money and time down the road (ha ha, my first pun) on repairs. I also suggest this project as a sort of CCC type deal for our current unemployment solution.

I digressed from my anti Wal-Mart point, but the ideology underlining it is the same. I think long term we need to pay more for high-quality, lasting products from small businesses instead of buying the cheaper version that will wither away and need to be replaced. In short, I think the greatest good for the largest group of people in America would mean more jobs here, more high-quality, lasting products here, and building a country we’d be proud to show our grandkids, instead of delivering them one in need of massive repairs.

I don’t mean to launch into a diatribe, but its my blog and I feel like ranting about the so-called ‘disaster in the gulf.’

1. This is a product of drilling for oil. If we’re going to insist on using the combustion engine, we have to realize the consumers are as much at fault here as BP. If we were not buying up oil like it was gold, then they wouldn’t push themselves to drill it out of the ocean with such urgency that it causes them to be rushed and thus a bit haphazard.

2. Can people please stop blaming BP like they are shocked that a company would put the environment or human beings in danger in return for profit? Lets not be naive. The company is not Tony Hayward, who is also not a super villain who is secretly delighted by the spill. The company is the stock holders, who will do anything (including spend their fortune on an ad campaign mid-crisis) to keep the shares from losing value. There is nobody who deserves to have his or her ass kicked more than the stock holders, good luck Mr. President, in finding them all and kicking them a good one.

3. I’m tired of seeing oil-saturated birds and wetlands. We take a very large, very toxic dump on the environment on a daily basis all across the planet, this really isn’t any different. People are not willing to move past the combustion engine (see point #1) so they can’t blame anyone for oil-soaked birds but themselves. Put down your remote, pick up a pen and write your state representative to support mass transportation and clean, renewable energy. Otherwise don’t criticize BP for pouring oil down fish throats. Also, don’t call anyone who wants to progress past outdated technology a hippie. I doubt Ben Franklin, Alexander Graham Bell, or Eli Whitney would enjoy that type of labeling, and I don’t feel like I have dreadlocks forming simply because I think wind energy is more intelligent than digging for dead dino bones to light on fire.

4. If Americans want more jobs (and I think they should be actively demanding them) then they need to force their representatives to enact laws that ban or prohibit outsourcing. We have high unemployment at home while our electronics, automotives and chemicals are produces abroad. Being the jobs home, put people to work, and get more funding for our science programs so we don’t loose our innovative edge. Also, give grants for clean or renewable energy research and reward people who provide solutions instead of point out problems.

5. I’m supremely pissed that the real bill for this crisis is going to come out of our pockets. The reserves of oil under the sea in the gulf belong to our country, yet a British BP comes in and sucks it out, slaps a sticker on it and sells it back to us for a profit. Once this all blows over, you can expect gas prices to one day go up enough for BP to recoup its losses in the gulf. After all, the Exxon Valdez crisis was a disaster that is quite aptly comparable, and yet Exxon today is the largest company in the world. Anyone who doesn’t think this bill is landing on them isn’t look at the larger picture- which is to say, that we’re essentially going to pay BP for this misstep.

6. I’d like to suggest someone slap the media quite hard for their constant nagging. When did the media in the USA become as lame as the politicians? These folks are supposed to be reporters, which means they should be doing a bit of research from time to time. Instead, we have poor Admiral Thad Allen up there making statements and these talking heads (the reporters) are fixated on all the wrong aspects of this seemingly never-ending story. The media has made this oil spill the only thing happening in the world. I want to hear about the news. This is not new, this is over 50 days old. And the media seems more than happy to keep a constant ticker on how much they harp on one story instead of report on what is actually happening now in the world. It makes me feel like the media is intentionally focusing on this to avoid having to do any real work. Meanwhile, we have real issues going on around the world that Americans should be aware of, and all they know about it how the media is trying to portray everyone as incompetent. The only really incompetent ones are the folks at CNN, Fox and every other major network that has long since stopped being respectable.

7. Finally, and this is a positive point for a change, I’d like to point out how awesome I think Thad Allen is. This military man, the ‘incident commander’ is a straight-shooting guy that really doesn’t’ bullshit his way through a press conference or dodge answers. If he were to run for office tomorrow I’d click ‘yes’ simply because he isn’t a politician. Reporters ask him questions and he gives an answer. Meanwhile, at a press conference yesterday, the White House spokesperson standing behind Than Allen interrupted several of his straight-forward answers to back peddle, blame shift, and generally make himself look like a lawyer/villain from a Tim Allen movie. I’m so outraged by the type of person who goes into politics (in both/all parties) that it is actually a real shock to see someone answer a questions bluntly. Way to go, Thad, and keep up the straight shooting. Also, you just might be the military’s best spokesman at present.

That is all I have to say about the disaster in the gulf….for now.

Traveling for the past year has been quite an enlightening experience. We left our home in Shanghai on May 1st, 2009 and are still on the road (now in America) traveling and taking in as much as possible from the world’s various and diverse cultures. One thing that has struck me recently is the extreme amount of marketing and advertising in the USA. We’re completely saturated in capitalism, and I don’t say this in a Marxist way, but in a ‘is this a product of our culture, or our political system?’ kind of way.

In China, marketing was only just emerging in full force. I remember distinctly the day cabs in Shanghai were outfitted with miniature TV screens on the back of the driver and passenger seats. They didn’t necessarily even market specific products so much as provide a venue for advertising in the hopes companies would catch on. By the time we left Shanghai come five months after the insulation, we had screeching ads blaring at us as we zoomed across the city.

In the ‘Stans we found a distinct lack of advertising, and in Turkmenistan we were standing at the bus stop one day and it suddenly hit us – “They don’t have Coca Cola here!” It was surprising, and yet wonderfully relieving. Also, the buses were not plastered in erectile dysfunction ads or maxi pad logos. It was also very nice.

Once we reached Europe we were no longer used to seeing ads at all, and were a bit taken aback by the billboards that blocked the view from the train. Although it was done a bit more tastefully than in China, the trains did contain a few little marketing stickers here and there. By and large, we were not overly saturated or bombarded.

In November we entered the USA in Florida and the wave of advertising and marketing was a choking shock. It seemed like too much, too fast, and none of it seemed relevant or even applicable to where it was being advertised. It was almost like companies plaster their logos over as much of the country as possible. Take, for example, Sonic (fast food). They advertise nation wide even though they don’t have restaurants in every state. Or, and this is what really began to irritate me when we returned to the USA, the radio seemed to play about two songs before cutting to 5 commercials, and we found the same to be true of TV. We actually timed it one afternoon while watching a one hour show—15+ minutes of commercials!

In recent weeks the extreme and overt advertising in the US has become a real drag. I’m tired of hearing about all these products. When I finally do get to the store I’m so burnt out on this stuff that I feel inclined to buy the products that advertise the least—thus rewarding them for not annoying me. I feel like I’m a 90 year old grumpy woman with a ‘get off my property’ agenda, but in all honesty cable TV costs a lot of money, why do I still have to listen to commercials? I have to pay for internet, so why do I still have to look at ads? Isn’t there a way to get these irritating marketing people out of my life?—the temporary solution is, at least for now, to head back overseas where I happily have no idea what new flavor Coca Cola is launching, or which washing detergent has more or less H20 in it. I also don’t want to know which cell phone company covers more of America, as I’ll never get a cell phone again (those horrible, soulless companies) nor which deodorant leaves less white crap on my black shirts (they all clog your pores with aluminum and eventually cause lymph nodes to be blocked). Anyways, I want out of this world of saturated media, and back into a place Coca-Cola free.

In recent months I’ve come to realize what my psychology (and statistics) professors meant by ‘Negative Response Theory.’ Essentially, people who are unhappy with a given situation are more likely to go out of their way to voice their opinions than people who are happy with the same situation. This skews all polls (as people with a grumpier outlook on the situation will go out of their way to participate while content people won’t) and makes having a blog somewhat unnerving. Here’s what I mean:

We write a lot of posts about the places we visit, and the people we talk to or the experiences we have. Its meant to be a fun travel website that really documents our journeys and has a bit of information on what we experienced, heard or saw. Nevertheless, total strangers go out of their way to point out flaws in the website. It is very rare that a total stranger goes out of his or her way to point out something good. Perhaps our site is total crap, or perhaps this is a perfect example of negative response theory. It is depressing because our culture trains us to be critical thinkers, which most of us view as a good thing, but some people just take it too far. Now we have a nation of amateur lawyers trying to find holes in every argument, conversation or passing phrase. To an extent this is healthy, but by and large I’m starting to think that Americans can’t enjoy anything anymore because they never stop questioning things.

But, and this is why it is depressing, Americans hardly ever seem to take action. I hear people complain all around me about the government, taxes, their township, etc., but instead of taking meaningful action they vent their frustrations by leaving negative and critical feedback everywhere they visit on the web. The web is now the world’s largest therapist as it offers a way to interact with the world by venting your built up frustrations and redirecting your anger at more meaningless (and therefore manageable) problems. For example, we’ve had a lot of people attack a post we did on a one day trip to Malaga. People go out of their way to leave an ‘I disagree!” comment, often without even reading the original blog post! We reserve the right to approve or deny all comments posted on our site, and are sad to report that some comments were so full of hatred and vile that we did not ‘ok’ them. We have children reading the site for goodness sakes! But the real issue is why someone, anyone, would get so upset about a random post on a random travel site. Methinks the issue lies elsewhere, but it doesn’t stop be from losing a lot of the passion I used to have for writing these posts. In a country where freedom of speech reached its pinnacle, I feel completely suppressed because it no longer matters what I say– someone will exercise their right to speak against it, even if they have no idea why! Here’s what I mean:

See, the poor guy was just trying to play ‘Dust in the Wind’ on his fake guitar. He isn’t hurting anyone, and yet people went out of their way to be rude. If they didn’t like it they should have navigated away from the page, which is what I suggest you do if you don’t like our website.  Nobody is forcing you to read it, after all.

Into Cave Abyss

After a great two days in Eugene, we packed up the old trusty mini van once again and decided to hit the road and head south. With all four of us in the minivan, things were lively and the drive flew by quickly. We reached the creepy town of Cave Junction around 10pm and decided to see what these Oregon caves were all about. Mike ran into a terrifying-looking gas station to ask directions to the caves. They replied, “its near the greyback.” Mike nodded knowledgeably and ambled back to the van to report the directions. We sat in the van blinking at each other. “What’s a Greyback?”

After passing several casino games, we pulled into Cave Junction’s only hotel where a lady with 1980’s makeup and shoulder pads so large they hit her in the ears told us to head for the greyback to find a camping spot. She gave us a free local newspaper (aka, a tiny pamphlet of nothingness) and pointed up the road. “To the greyback!” We repeated her mantra back to her with a bit less gusto, “to the greyback?!” and made our way out the door.

Eventually, after a beer stop and a few more inquiries, we decided to just find out for ourselves what this mysterious greyback was. Twelve miles up a horribly-constructed road we found a campground and Mike ran past a “CLOSED” sign to inquire again. From deep in the woods a woman’s voiced yelled out, in true Goonies style, “We’re closed!” and then a dog began to bark very close by and Mike and his friend sprinted into the van. No help at the camp site. We drove back down the road and saw a lit phone booth. A mirage in the woods that seemed beyond creepy. I took a picture (yes, its on flickr, no it didn’t turn out very well because the car was bumping along a dirt road as I took it). It turned out the phone booth belonged to a man who ran a camp site. Score! He installed us in an RV lot for 16$ and we set about making a fire and cooking our dinner. Only after we finally figured out how to assemble the tent did we realize the rain cover was full of holes.

Mike and Lu in Oregon Caves

In the morning, the forest seemed only slightly less creepy. We packed up our camp site  after making some breakfast on what was left of the fire, and headed deeper into the woods to solve the mystery of the greyback. You just can’t stop for intrepid explorers eager for discovery.

The Oregon Caves system is a national monument. And we learned from our 90 minute tour of one of the caves that a monument is a presidential decree rather than an act of congress.  Hopefully that helps you down the road in bar trivia. Our national monument ranger wore the typical OD green suit and funny ranger hat, and talked to our group of adults like we were perhaps 6 or 7 years of age. She told us stories in a drawn out tone, and even called us kiddos. She led us deep into the heart of a cave, some 200m underground. It was a dark, creepy and yet beautiful experience. Unfortunately, in our attempt to preserve the cave someone cut it all up to put in cement floors, stainless steel stairs, railings, ramps, lighting, cables for lighting and emergency exits. Its really not much of a natural thing anymore, its more like a movie set on Batman. My hypothesis– if humans find it, its screwed.

Nevertheless, we enjoyed the tour through tiny, musty cave rooms that looked very strangely like our first apartment in China. We scaled up and down slippery steps, around hanging stalactites and over pointy stalagmites. We even had to duck once. Eventually we left the caves without interacting with any live nature, and we drove back through Cave Junction (still creepy in daylight) and onwards towards California. While we never did learn what a greyback was, some mysteries are better left unsolved.

We packed up the minivan and decided to head south to see two longtime friends and adventurous souls who live in Eugene, OR. The drive was pleasant down ol’ I-5, and we arrived made great time without incident until we got to the lovely and illogically grid-like, one-way nightmare of downtown Eugene. We thanked Map Quest for their incorrect instructions and, without cell phones, decided to head towards the only hill in the city for a better look. Turns out that was the hill they lived on. Problemo solved.

The following morning, after an informative and retro night on the town,we ventured to a local hot spot, Off the Waffle, for some breakfast. A nice treat there, and then a quick peek at a vintage book store where I found a rare book on exploring Central Asia for herbs, before we decided to hike to the top of Eugene’s hill for a better look. As Mike was backing up the trusty Toyota, there was a bit of a mishap that doesn’t bear retelling. Suffice to say Mike can never make fun of how I drive again. Ever! Score! This was the best accident of all time, in my book.

Area Around Eugene

Eugene is a very unique city. In our limited time there we saw that very few large corporations have penetrated into the city’s center. Anti-expansion laws have made property prices skyrocket, but there are no suburbs full of Wal-Marts or Home Depots either. Independent restaurants and cafes dot the city, and the uniqueness is almost overwhelming at first. Americans seem to like arriving in a new town and having it look almost identical to the town they left. McDonald’s, Walgreen’s, Target…. all of these places are lined up on consumer alley (or main street) in almost every American town of any size. Eugene is a breath of fresh air and shows what America could look like if it wanted to. It reminded me of why I disliked traveling in the USA– every time you arrive somewhere new you feel like you haven’t left home yet.

While traveling to Eugene made me aware of all of this, it was also pleasantly different, and we spent a few days soaking that in. The higher prices were well worth it to try so many new things. By the way, at an independent grocery store I found out there are literally thousands of different kinds of cereal. Turns out if you shop at a name-brand store they get to decide your menu for you. And here I thought all along there were only a few kinds! Silly me. Eugene’s independent grocery store had two isles of bulk cereals. You take as much as you want, mix and match, add accompaniments, and you’re off! Don’t get me started on how many kinds of juice there are. I did not think you could find lychee juice outside of China. Anyways, suffice to say we liked Eugene.

What better way to spend the Armageddon, then waiting it out safely underground? Apparently I’m not the first person to think of this. Washington State is renown for its end-of-worlders, and recently I met someone who worked in construction, building underground shelters for folks who live in constant fear. These shelters, or “UGs” as the builders call them, cost more than most people’s primary homes, and are built to withstand large eruptions or man-made blasts. They are usually constructed under a barn or other large object to conceal construction, and are stocked with yummy end-of-days foods like dehydrated eggs and grains in large 5 gallon tubs. The end of the world business is quite a lucrative one, apparently, as these specialty tubs of food and supplies have a huge profit margin. The Sea Egg (in the image to the left) is just such an underground shelter. It is essentially a bubble deep under ground, where earthquakes, eruptions or anything else cannot penetrate. The home can be built by two people with re-bar and concrete, and the plans can be bought online or else a professional team can add the greater comforts (and style) if you hire it done.

But underground homes are not the only alternative should Armageddon strike. Underwater homes are just one additional alternative. Ocean real-estate is cheap (aka-free) and the construction costs are not as steep as you might think. Already, chic underwater hotels are attracting attention internationally. you simply run your boat or swim out to a pipe in the water, climb down the pipe into your home. An additional model has people swimming or scuba diving down into a wet room and coming up inside your underwater home. This alternative is a ways off, and in the testing stages on most designs. For now, the do-it-yourself underground sea egg, or hiring a local UG construction company may be more practical and logical.

This isn’t one of those hippy diatribes about the body corporate, or a quasi-scientific spiel about the plausible connection between tumors and constant reception (although I hear that’s a serious upcoming issue). Its just a simple explanation about one person’s decision not to own a cell phone, and why.

First off, the commitment. I don’t own anything else I have to sign away years of my life for. Two year contracts! You have to be kidding! And if you move somewhere that isn’t under their coverage they’ll drag out the process making you pay for months on end while they ‘verify’ your move. And you have to send them copies of your bills with your new address on them! Why not my birth certificate, or my dental records? I moved to China and Verizon took months to let me out of my contract! No wonder commitment is scary– you no longer want a service and yet you could be forced to keep it until your contract is up. Now that’s harsh!

Second, the lack of serenity. I don’t think I’m that important that I need to be reachable at all times. Also, being able to be in the moment is hard enough with all the ADD distractions, I don’t need to be texting someone or twittering how my lunch is going in order to enjoy it. Every once in a while I can watch a TV show or take a walk without being interrupted or snapping a picture of the moment and sending it to a friend with cute little smiley faces made out of parenthesis and colons.

Third, planning is lost. Without cell phones none of my friends seem to be able to make a plan and carry it through. They say, “ok, text me directions and call when you get there” and I try to explain that we’ll have to plan ahead and just trust that the other person will be there. I know it’s a lot to ask, but hey, our parent’s generation managed to meet their friends at the milkshake café or whatever without carrying a phone in their pocket.

Finally, and this may seem pedantic, but the ring tones are just a ridiculous way to accessorize and/or feel special. I don’t need to impress my friends with a shiny bejeweled talk box that has Morgan Freeman’s voice telling me who is calling and doubles as a camera, calculator, thermometer, organizer, computer, and voice recorder. I just don’t need more stuff distracting me from real life and interrupting me when I’m enjoying it.

Not many people make backtracks like we do! To make my point, our trips inside America in the last several months

Route map?

have been hectic, repetitive and somewhat ridiculous. Just look at that map! We landed on the east coast, managed to make it to Illinois, only to jump to New Hampshire and Washington, back to Illinois, then to Texas, back to Illinois, then to Washington again. make any sense to you? Yeah, us neither. And we did it ALL by land only, no air travel. If you ever want to hear our opinion of Amtrak or the Great American Road System, pleas ask. We’d be happy to monologue for you, and since Mike plays the guitar, he can even do it to song, if that’s your preference.

I have to confess, a huge portion of America has been neglected in our ridiculous travels, and that area is boring– which is why we didn’t go there (California, Oregon and parts of Nevada exempted). I’d love to see the Grand Canyon, but they located it in the middle of nowhere, so until they get some interesting side attractions out there we’ll be sticking to the more densely populated areas.

One of the amazing things about ground travel in the USA is the gas prices. It can be high in, say, Seattle and low in DC. Explain this to me, someone please? Why do the people along the coasts, where oil is delivered, often pay more?  Isn’t Canada our biggest oil supplier? Why do northern states pay more than southern ones? Check out this map of gas prices in the USA– see a trend?

Another thing that surprised me was the tax rates in various states we traveled through. Texas, for example, had an 8% sales tax rate while Arkansas was 9% and Missouri was 7%.  Property taxes is not taxed, but everything else is. Washington has a $9.00 minimum wage while Wyoming gets a mere $5.15 an hour. Some states don’t even have minimum wage standards. Emma Goldman would be sad.

Nevertheless, the trip was amazing. I’ve never seen so many MAC trucks! Ya know, America, a railway system might solve the over-congestion of the roads. I’ve also never seen so many fast food restaurants. You see a lot of interesting folks in sweat pants at the McDonald’s, or rummaging in the trash at various rest stops. We even saw one man get out of the driver’s seat of his RAM truck and finish his beer then toss it in the trash before peeing in the grass NEXT TO the bathrooms. Also, at any given interstate gas station you’ll find a plethora of items for sale that no one would, or has ever bought. Like neon pink mud flaps with a naked woman outline on them. And the gas station check-out guy is always eating or spitting sunflower seeds while you try to check out.

So, the cross-country ridiculousness went well, and we’re in Washington now. believe it or not we’ll be heading back to the Midwest soon enough– enhancing the backtrack.

Recently, I’ve taken the Empire Builder from start to finish a total of three times, that’s around 6,600 miles!

Traveling by train is an activity that requires great patience, but if you are looking in the right direction you’ll see much of what America is renowned for without getting out of your seat. The major cities of Chicago, Minneapolis and Seattle lie along the route, as do the amber waves of grain. Purple mountains of majesty sit majestically in the background while the fruited plains of Washington pass by. Rocky rivers, waterfalls and lakes all flash past the Amtrak window. As I sit on the train I have full visibility of the sky above, the massive expanse of land out my window, and the knowledge that those flying overhead above me are sorely missing out. It takes roughly 48 hours to cross the Empire Builder, and in the time you’ll witness a sunrise and a sunset (probably both in Montana) with snowy grasslands spotted in geese, or farmers plowing their fields and pausing to pet their trusty Labrador. If you are not in a hurry, and you can appreciate the little things in life, than you’ll appreciate a trip through the heartland by rail.

When I tell people I take the train across America, I’m usually met with laughter or a Bill-Clinton-like sad smile and a sympathetic, “I’m Sorry!” This rubbed off on me a bit, I’ll admit, and I was not looking forward to my third, 48-hour journey in as many months on Amtrak. After boarding my car, however, it took no time at all for me to be refreshed with the excitement of travel and the amazing views of the Mid- and Northwest. Between Milwaukee and nowhere-town North Dakota I sat next to a US Air Force officer who had been stationed in Korea for the past several years. He had driven his car to St. Louis to be shipped to his next duty station and was returning to his family in North Dakota to pack up his modest home and move to Alaska. This gentleman regaled me with stories of life in Korea, and even flipped open his laptop and gave me a military-style briefing on the DMZ (demilitarized zone along the 38th parallel). Two months ago on a previous Empire Builder experience I sat next to a woman from the Dakotas whose husband has recently passed away. She was visiting her daughter in Seattle after the funeral and talked to me about what a wonderful man her postal-service husband had been, and what she would do now that she was alone (teach Opera appreciation at her local college). Even further back, I met a girl who had been in prison for assault, only recently released and heading home—I can’t say that was a meaningful experience for me, but it was a part of America I had not seen before. Encounters with people on Amtrak are not always easy, but they are always memorable and for the most part these movable parades are a cross section of society that few get to really appreciate.

As we pulled into Seattle, where the tracks follow the sound so you have a mist-covered view of the water with mountains in the background, a bald eagle emerged from the mist and flew alongside the train. You’ll not find anything as mystical and beautiful as that from a tiny airline window.

Bush Library

A  recent visit to the George Bush Presidential Library in College Station, Texas revealed a deeper look at the man, the President and the Bush family. We were taken on a long, very detailed tour of President Bush, from his childhood to his military career and his courtship of Barbara. We walked through his life in Texas starting a family and a business, and then his entrance into politics and his gradual assent to the highest office in the government. We learned a great deal  about his time in the UN, and in China, as well as details about his family and how his children fared while he was in office and beyond. A replica of the Oval Office and Situation and Speech rooms made the visit seem like a tour of the White House, and also gave a sense of the pressure and stress of the position of president.

Bush Museum

The museum itself was very well organized and designed, with accessibility and interactive displays as a focus. When entering the museum visitors must first pass through security, as the former President and first lady have an apartment on the premises and are known to ‘drop by’ the museum from time to time. A friendly volunteer will then direct you towards the introductory theater, where a short film clip is shown of the former President and First Lady explaining the layout of the museum. From there, you can walk through the artifacts donated by the family and their colleagues and friends, including family photos, quote boards and video clips. For children, the museum has a video game simulation of landing a plane on an air craft carrier, as George Bush did in the war. A replica of the plane dangles above, and throughout the museum there are activities for children and games to keep them entertained while adults read and view the materials provided.

Having visited only one other Presidential Library, the Abraham Lincoln, I found this a real treat. We had hoped to also stop and see the William Clinton Library and Museum, but time did not permit. I hope to visit all of the Presidential libraries at some point, as they offer real insight (albeit biased) into the person in the office, instead of the figurehead. They are an invaluable resource and a great asset to the nation.

The museum is located at: 1000 George Bush Drive West, College Station, Texas 77845, and costs $7 for adults, $6 for seniors and $3 for children. Open on all non-major holiday days. For more information on the Bush Library, visit their official website.

Palo Alto Battlefield

If you live or vacation in Southern – Central Texas, this is especially important to all the winter Texans, take a short drive North of Brownsville to visit the Palo Alto Battlefield.  Easy to find and only taking an hour or so see, the Palo Alto Museum was a refreshing overview of sometimes forgotten American, and Mexican, history.  The quaint museum displays artifacts from the battlefield as well as detailed information regarding political debate on the subject before, during, and after the war.  There are uniforms, guns, cannon balls, maps, and pictures, but if you museumed’ out, you can watch the PBS video on the battle of Palo Alto, which gives a great overview of the battle as well as the museum.

The museum argued that the first battle of the Mexican – American War (Palo Alto) was provoked by President Polk, who had his mind set on the acquisition and extension of the United States to the Western seaboard.  According to what we saw at the Palo Alto Museum, after skirmishes and heated debate over Texas, the United States, and the Mexican border was ongoing in congress.  Polk himself declared the Rio Grand as the border, although it was not recognized as the official border by either side.  When Mexican General Mariano Arista crossed the river with his 3,400 troops, it was portrayed as an invasion by Polk politicians and Zachary Taylor, sent by President Polk earlier to further stir up Mexican fear of a U.S. invasion, moved towards ‘Fort Texas.’  The front line, still visible today, stretched over one mile.  The terrain made any type of charge suicide so Taylor used new artillery tactics called ‘flying artillery’ to fire once and relocate the artillery to fire against any flanking attempts by the enemy.  The U.S. was unaware of their artillery’s devastation until morning when they discovered that General Arista had pulled out and left over 100 casualties behind in the field.   The American artillery used newer explosive cannon balls which shot shards of shrapnel all around the impact area.  The Mexican army, on the other hand, used older (non- impact – explosive) weapons and artillery.

General Taylor was ordered to push forward and invaded Fort Brown (modern day Brownsville) and Matamoros before pushing deep into Mexican territory, eventually all the way to Mexico city.  In two short years, Polk had negotiated the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo with Mexico in which Mexico lost over half its land to the United States and the US pushed its borders down to the Rio Grand in Texas as well as purchased what is now California, New Mexico, Arizona, and Utah for 15 million USD (about 370 million in 2009).  You can walk through the snake infested trails of Palo Alto in amazement at the epicenter of what would eventually lead to the the largest expansion of the United States since the Louisiana Purchase.  A highly worthwhile and recommended visit for anyone who appreciates history, especially the less well known aspects.